FLIGHTS OF THE IMAGINATION

Posted: February 3, 2012 in Random
Tags: , , , , , ,

Flies are delightful creatures although greatly misunderstood. They dance around in the air with as much grace and panache as Fred Astaire. There’s something so primal about it because flies have been dancing to the beat of their wings before humans even walked the Earth.

It’s my opinion that flies have been the victims of a smear campaign conducted by humans. Whenever the word ‘fly’ crops up people immediately shoot you dirty looks. “Flies! But they’re so dirty. It makes my skin crawl. I’d rather eat my toenail clippings than have a fly land on my food.” It seems there is no end to the name calling. Pestilent, parasite, food robber, cleanliness defiler, to name but a few. Yet the flies in all their humility, turn a deaf ear, and carry on their saintly existences, impervious to the barbs.

I’m not sure how well that would go down if the shoe was on the other foot. How would humans like it if they were constantly ridiculed by flies? It’s not as though it wouldn’t be easy for them because humans as a race have a great propensity for creating mayhem out of seemingly innocuous situations. And don’t even get me started on our ability to carry on eating even though we aren’t hungry.

In many respects we could learn a lot from flies especially when it comes to eating. First and foremost flies aren’t fussy about what they eat. They’ll gladly eat whatever is available. Yet how many times have you seen a child throw a tantrum because he’d rather eat McDonalds than beetroot. Admittedly beetroot is the devil’s work but I think we need to learn to be less fussy. After all there are people in the world suffering from starvation like Minnesota for example. Okay I concede I’m not entirely sure if people in Minnesota are in fact starving, but Minnesota sounds so exotic I wanted to include it in my blog post, and now I have. At least one of us can say they accomplished something worthwhile today.

Secondly flies are very fastidious when it comes to portion control. Well they have no option really because their arms, or are they legs, anyway the point is they’re so thin they can’t even lift a grain of rice. Speaking of rice, often when I see a fly eating, it reminds me of someone using chopsticks. It takes so much effort to eventually get something in your mouth, that it hardly seems worth it. The point is humans could learn a lesson here. You don’t actually have to keep on eating, you can stop, if you like. Fat people take note.

They say what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. As far as I know flies don’t go around massacring people with gay abandon, therefore it stands to reason that they’re probably making us stronger. Yes they spread germs from time to time but they’re actually performing a service. Without these ‘positive’ germs our immune systems would be idle and grow weak from lack of use. Therefore I think it’s only right that we thank flies for making our immune systems invincible. Thank you for turning our immune systems into Chuck Norris.

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Comments
  1. Sarchasm2 says:

    hahaha flies are a no no around me. I can’t flap my arms to scare them off but I’ve become very accurate at spitting on them. Pay back.

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